I've mentioned a few times to Brenton that I would like a light pink necklace to match my light pink butterfly earrings my dad got me a few years ago. I have a deep, magenta-pink necklace that looks wonderful with bright pinks, but I've wanted a light pink one for awhile now. I figured Brenton would go to Macy's or Target and find a simple, cheap necklace that would work just fine. In fact, I was pretty positive that was what I'd be receiving on my birthday, and was perfectly pleased.
I woke up this morning to the smell of bacon, fruit, and pancakes. Brenton brought me breakfast in bed comprising of berry pancakes with a layer of whipped cream on the top and a smile made with berries, to create a pancake snowman face, scrambled eggs, and bacon. Of course the meal would not be complete without a glass of "birthday orange juice." In my early years of college, my roommates and I decided that the best orange juice from the store was "Simply Orange." However, that orange juice is immensely expensive, so we dubbed it Birthday Orange Juice, because we could only afford it on special occasions. The name and tradition has stuck ever since.
After breakfast Brenton asked me to close my eyes. I knew the pink necklace was on it's way. He placed a tissue-wrapped parcel on my lap. I began to untie the ribbon at the top when I noticed a very light printing on the tissue paper reading, "TIFFANY AND CO." I was shocked. There was no way he got me something from Tiffany's. Sure enough, as the tissue paper fell off there lay the infamous turquoise box with the white ribbon tied around it. I've never seen that color turquoise on anything else but a Tiffany's box. I pulled off the ribbon and lifted the lid. There was a small card inside in which Brenton had printed a quote from "Breakfast at Tiffany's." It read, "You know those days when you get the reds? The only thing that does any good is to jump in a cab and go to Tiffany's. Calms me down right away. The quietness and the proud look of it. Nothing very bad could happen to you there." And then there was the soft turquoise leather bag. I carefully loosed the ties, and pulled out a beautiful, silver necklace with a light pink, sparkly heart pendant. It was so beautiful. Every tiny little detail on it was perfect, and so delicate.
I have an amazing husband. He is so kind and good to me. I know that he is the best decision I have ever made. I love that he knows just how to treat and make me feel like quite a lady. So here's to turning 23! May it be all that I dream for it to be.
Monday, December 14, 2009
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Santa Bells and Sniffles
Well it's finally looking a lot like Christmas. All of Brenton's presents have safely arrived, are wrapped, and under the tree. Speaking of trees, ours is put up, beautifully lit, with all my childhood ornaments adorning its branches. We didn't have a star or angel to put on top, and they're surprisingly expensive. So, we took one of my Belle barbie dolls, put her in her red and gold Christmas dress, and placed her on top of the tree. I love it. It makes me smile every time I see it. Decorations are thoughtfully placed around the apartment, and the atmosphere is generally lovely. It's a pleasant scene to come home to after a sorely trying day. We even had our first heavy snowfall on Monday, so even the ground and trees outside are putting on their frosty coverings for the season.
Our Christmas cards are in the mail, and our Santa e-mail is in full swing. For those that haven't heard, we have set up a Santa e-mail for children to write to and get a letter back from Santa Claus. It is Santa.CommDept@gmail.com . Please feel free to forward it along to anyone who might be interested. It's a joy to read the sweet letters from children. I'm amazed at how many of them say, "I love you, Santa." We've enjoyed reading them so much.
I'm grateful for all of the Christmas frivolity, because it's been a very long week. I didn't realize that when you're married, if one spouse catches a cold/virus, it's only a matter of time before the other one does. Usually this occurs just as the other one is feeling better. So after two weeks of frustration and irritation while one spouse recovers, those two weeks are stretched into a month of agitation. I think both of us have had it with the cold season. It was my turn to catch the friendly cold, and it's been pretty nasty. Not enough to take a sick day, well, I'm out of sick days thanks to the swine flu in October, so I couldn't take a day off if I wanted to. Just enough to make me uncomfortable, grouchy, and all together exasperated and huffy. In the midst of this, it's so nice to see the tree, and listen to Christmas music in the car. Or to make pie and smell the cinnimon scented room spray in the office. It's kind of what's keeping me moving forward.
I've got a lot to look forward to though. It's my birthday on Monday, and a week later Brenton and I are on a plane headed for a wonderful Virginia Christmas with family, and all things merry. I can't wait. *sniffle*
Our Christmas cards are in the mail, and our Santa e-mail is in full swing. For those that haven't heard, we have set up a Santa e-mail for children to write to and get a letter back from Santa Claus. It is Santa.CommDept@gmail.com . Please feel free to forward it along to anyone who might be interested. It's a joy to read the sweet letters from children. I'm amazed at how many of them say, "I love you, Santa." We've enjoyed reading them so much.
I'm grateful for all of the Christmas frivolity, because it's been a very long week. I didn't realize that when you're married, if one spouse catches a cold/virus, it's only a matter of time before the other one does. Usually this occurs just as the other one is feeling better. So after two weeks of frustration and irritation while one spouse recovers, those two weeks are stretched into a month of agitation. I think both of us have had it with the cold season. It was my turn to catch the friendly cold, and it's been pretty nasty. Not enough to take a sick day, well, I'm out of sick days thanks to the swine flu in October, so I couldn't take a day off if I wanted to. Just enough to make me uncomfortable, grouchy, and all together exasperated and huffy. In the midst of this, it's so nice to see the tree, and listen to Christmas music in the car. Or to make pie and smell the cinnimon scented room spray in the office. It's kind of what's keeping me moving forward.
I've got a lot to look forward to though. It's my birthday on Monday, and a week later Brenton and I are on a plane headed for a wonderful Virginia Christmas with family, and all things merry. I can't wait. *sniffle*
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Thanksgiving Menu
I'm attempting to cook my own Thanksgiving dinner for the first time. It's going to be just me and my sweet husband, Brenton. Here's our menu.
*
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Stuffed Cornish Hens
Vanilla Cornbread Stuffing
Some type of rolls (Brenton's in charge of that)
Cheesy Potatoes (Again, Brenton's assignment)
Assorted Relish Tray
Steamed Asparagus
Creamed Broccoli
Fresh apple, with a zest of orange, Cranberry Salad
Sweetened Sweet Potatoes with a brulee'd marshmallow coating
Crisp Sparkling Cider
Fresh Apple Cranberry Pie
Whipped Pumpkin Cheesecake Pie
Mulled, Spiced Cider (for dessert with the pies)
*
I know it will be a challenge, but I think I can handle it, and I'm pretty excited to try. One of the greatest things about the Thanksgiving meal is that you can pile everything on your plate, let it all blend together, and it still tastes good. It also makes fantastic leftovers. We're going shopping for everything this weekend, and we've been really careful with our grocery budget this month so that we can go all out for Thanksgiving. If you would like any of the recipes for the dishes on the menu, let me know. My mom can make all of this completely gluten, dairy, nut, and fresh fruit free by the way. She's amazing like that.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Financial Security Begins with a Budget
I have often heard the council, "live within your means." Excellent advice. We live in a time where people use credit cards to pay of other credit cards. Everything is "buy now, pay later." Debt is a plague. It never sleeps, it never takes a holiday, and if not taken care of, it grows rapidly. If there's one thing my parents have taught me in addition to the gospel, it's how to budget. Because of their love, support, and good council, I managed to graduate from college debt free with money in the bank. Brenton and I were able to get married debt free. Now that I am working in a secure job, we are in a fantastic position to save and prepare for our exciting future. This past weekend we factored in my new salary, and created a budget based upon the system my mother taught me in college. It's fantastic advice, so I thought I'd share it with the rest of you.
Step 1. Pay your tithes and offerings. Before you even open the envelopes containing the bills, pay your tithing. Before you budget your monthly income, pay your tithing. Each month, contribute a generous fast offering. I can testify that as Brenton and I have done this, no matter what the situation we have always had enough. It is always the number one priority when it comes to finances. You cannot expect anything else to work out if you have neglected this crucial step.
Step 2. Make a list of everything you have to pay each month, no matter what. Rent/mortgage payments, utilities, cell phone bill, Internet, insurance, etc. These bills typically stay at a set rate, so next to each item, write out the price you pay each month.
Step 3. Add on to your list things that you have to pay for that are not at a specific rate. Things like groceries, gas, entertainment, and eating out. Commit to a reasonable amount that you know you can stick to. If you make a completely unreasonable goal, you won't keep it, and you might as well have not created the budget in the first place.
Step 4. Set aside money each month for your retirement fund. The earlier you start, the more it builds up. Next, set aside money each month for your emergency savings. This fund is for "rainy days," like when the car breaks down, or your basement floods, or you have to go to the hospital, an emergency root canal, etc. If you don't put aside money for this, life's little mishaps will catch up with you and you won't be prepared.
Step 5. Always have a miscellaneous category. Because every month you will have some random expense that you won't know where to factor in. You bought a new pair of shoes, or decorations for your home. It was somebody's birthday. You found a really great deal on windshield wipers, things like that. Give it a specific amount that fits within your means.
Step 6. Any money that you have leftover after everything else has been factored in, use as a "flux" category. Because let's face it, each month there's always something that needs more money than you thought. It's a family birthday, you need to buy new furniture, Christmas shopping, painting a bathroom, etc. If you plan in advance with the flux money, these expenditures won't throw you for a loop. Also, if you don't have anything that month that requires the flux money, put it in a separate fund for a vacation in the future.
Step 7. Once everything has been given a category and a specific amount has been assigned, MAKE SURE that it does NOT go over your monthly income. And double check that you have already taken out the money set aside for tithing and fast offerings when looking at the numbers for your monthly income.
Step 8. Next to the column that has each category's allotted amount to spend, create a column to enter in the amounts actually spent that month. Make sure that you are keeping good track of this. Use whatever system works for you. Track it online, in a checkbook, on a chart in your wallet, and always verify with receipts or spending reports.
Step 9. If there is a difference from the amount planned or actually spent in a certain category whether negative or positive, write it in the column next to the amount actually spent. Make sure you mark whether it's leftover money, or if you're in the red.
Step. 10 Next to the difference column, make a column entitled, "Compensation" and for each category that has a negative or positive difference, write down where you are going to take the money from, or what you're doing with the surplus. For example, if you went over in the "eating out" category, in the compensation column write that you took money from the grocery fund to cover it. If for any reason at the end of the month you are still in the negative, factor that into the next months budget by decreasing the amount there.
I have found that this system works. If you don't keep a budget, it's so easy to lose track of your expenditures and fall into debt. By keeping track of everything, it disciplines you to live within your means, and save up for something better. As always, remember that tithing and fast offering always comes first. No exceptions. Even if that means you will not be able to pay for something mandatory. The Lord will provide a way. I know this to be true.
So happy spending! But remember to keep track and stick to the plan!
Step 1. Pay your tithes and offerings. Before you even open the envelopes containing the bills, pay your tithing. Before you budget your monthly income, pay your tithing. Each month, contribute a generous fast offering. I can testify that as Brenton and I have done this, no matter what the situation we have always had enough. It is always the number one priority when it comes to finances. You cannot expect anything else to work out if you have neglected this crucial step.
Step 2. Make a list of everything you have to pay each month, no matter what. Rent/mortgage payments, utilities, cell phone bill, Internet, insurance, etc. These bills typically stay at a set rate, so next to each item, write out the price you pay each month.
Step 3. Add on to your list things that you have to pay for that are not at a specific rate. Things like groceries, gas, entertainment, and eating out. Commit to a reasonable amount that you know you can stick to. If you make a completely unreasonable goal, you won't keep it, and you might as well have not created the budget in the first place.
Step 4. Set aside money each month for your retirement fund. The earlier you start, the more it builds up. Next, set aside money each month for your emergency savings. This fund is for "rainy days," like when the car breaks down, or your basement floods, or you have to go to the hospital, an emergency root canal, etc. If you don't put aside money for this, life's little mishaps will catch up with you and you won't be prepared.
Step 5. Always have a miscellaneous category. Because every month you will have some random expense that you won't know where to factor in. You bought a new pair of shoes, or decorations for your home. It was somebody's birthday. You found a really great deal on windshield wipers, things like that. Give it a specific amount that fits within your means.
Step 6. Any money that you have leftover after everything else has been factored in, use as a "flux" category. Because let's face it, each month there's always something that needs more money than you thought. It's a family birthday, you need to buy new furniture, Christmas shopping, painting a bathroom, etc. If you plan in advance with the flux money, these expenditures won't throw you for a loop. Also, if you don't have anything that month that requires the flux money, put it in a separate fund for a vacation in the future.
Step 7. Once everything has been given a category and a specific amount has been assigned, MAKE SURE that it does NOT go over your monthly income. And double check that you have already taken out the money set aside for tithing and fast offerings when looking at the numbers for your monthly income.
Step 8. Next to the column that has each category's allotted amount to spend, create a column to enter in the amounts actually spent that month. Make sure that you are keeping good track of this. Use whatever system works for you. Track it online, in a checkbook, on a chart in your wallet, and always verify with receipts or spending reports.
Step 9. If there is a difference from the amount planned or actually spent in a certain category whether negative or positive, write it in the column next to the amount actually spent. Make sure you mark whether it's leftover money, or if you're in the red.
Step. 10 Next to the difference column, make a column entitled, "Compensation" and for each category that has a negative or positive difference, write down where you are going to take the money from, or what you're doing with the surplus. For example, if you went over in the "eating out" category, in the compensation column write that you took money from the grocery fund to cover it. If for any reason at the end of the month you are still in the negative, factor that into the next months budget by decreasing the amount there.
I have found that this system works. If you don't keep a budget, it's so easy to lose track of your expenditures and fall into debt. By keeping track of everything, it disciplines you to live within your means, and save up for something better. As always, remember that tithing and fast offering always comes first. No exceptions. Even if that means you will not be able to pay for something mandatory. The Lord will provide a way. I know this to be true.
So happy spending! But remember to keep track and stick to the plan!
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Top 10 Reasons to be Happy for Today, Nov. 5th, 2009
10. I finally set up an appointment today at work after literally hundreds of cold calls.
9. I discovered another one of my outfits that looks great with my new brown boots.
8. Did I mention that I have new brown boots? They're so cute.
7. Every time I look to the left of my desk, I see the D.C. temple, a picture of Christ, and a slideshow photo frame of pictures from my wedding.
6. My angelic niece left me a voicemail on my phone which I have now listened to over a dozen times.
5. Today was payday.
4. Tomorrow is Friday.
3. My sister celebrated her silver birthday today with my mom, and it made me smile every time I thought of them enjoying the day together.
2. I didn't lose my voice from the head cold I have until 6:45 this evening.
1. Today is the 2-year anniversary of the day I sat down next to a boy in the library who would one day become my eternal companion and very best friend. I love you, Brenton Adams Hoyos. Thanks for asking me for my number 2 years ago, today. I promise I'll spend the rest of forever showing you how grateful I am for that bold gesture.
9. I discovered another one of my outfits that looks great with my new brown boots.
8. Did I mention that I have new brown boots? They're so cute.
7. Every time I look to the left of my desk, I see the D.C. temple, a picture of Christ, and a slideshow photo frame of pictures from my wedding.
6. My angelic niece left me a voicemail on my phone which I have now listened to over a dozen times.
5. Today was payday.
4. Tomorrow is Friday.
3. My sister celebrated her silver birthday today with my mom, and it made me smile every time I thought of them enjoying the day together.
2. I didn't lose my voice from the head cold I have until 6:45 this evening.
1. Today is the 2-year anniversary of the day I sat down next to a boy in the library who would one day become my eternal companion and very best friend. I love you, Brenton Adams Hoyos. Thanks for asking me for my number 2 years ago, today. I promise I'll spend the rest of forever showing you how grateful I am for that bold gesture.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Being Belle
As most of you know, I have been obsessed with Beauty and the Beast since my 5th birthday when my mom took me out on a special date, just me and her, to see the beloved Disney classic. I can still remember how awed I was when all the candles lit up in a giant chorus line during "Be Our Guest," and how exciting it was to watch it with my mother. It was so magical, and from that day on I knew who I wanted to be.
As the years went by I began collecting just about everything I could possibly get my hands on that had anything to do with Beauty and the Beast. The Christmas I turned six my mom sewed me my very own Belle dress, and I wore it every single day when I came home from school. I remember one time I was eating chocolate pudding in it, and spilled some on the left sleeve, leaving a permanent brown stain on the golden polyester. I treasured that dress because in my mind it truly defined who I was: a beautiful princess with long brown hair, and chocolaty brown eyes. I was Princess Katiebelle. Rider of imaginary horses named Philippe, and reader of books. I could conquer anything, and no beastly man was going to tell me what to do! I used to tell my parents, "When I grow up and go to dances I'm going to tell the boys, 'If you want to dance with a pretty girl, no beggars!'" Princesses never hang down their heads, and neither would I!
When it was time for my first high school prom there was no question in my mind of what my dress was going to look like. I had been devastated the year I turned 11 and could no longer wear my beautiful gold dress. So in the early spring of my junior year Mom took me out on a special date, just me and her, to buy fabric to make a new Belle dress. We scoured the rows and rows of fabric until we found the perfect combination, and then brought it to a seamstress to make my caparison dreams come true.
And then before I knew it I was in college, and looking for a way to make some extra cash without having to spend too much time doing it. I sat brainstorming, and then of course, there was the answer right in front of me. I would get paid to be myself. So I started entertaining little girls' birthday parties as Princess Belle. I can't tell you how amazing it is to walk into a room full of little girls and see their faces light up in delight because you are there. It still makes me tear up a little to think of their sweet hands reaching up to touch my face and to hear them exclaim, "I can't believe it's really you!" It often surprised me when at the end of the party the parents would hand me a check. I'd think, "Oh yeah! This is my job!"
I sit here reminiscing about all of this because today we had a big costume party at my work. Students and parents brought in their children to go trick-or-treating around the building. I wore my beautiful, sparkling Belle dress and greeted little princesses all over again. It was such a joy. As I watched them skipping up and down the halls in their shiny dresses, I could almost see a spunky, 5-year-old girl with two long brown, braided pig-tails, and chocolaty brown eyes. I imagined her rushing straight up at me with a look that said, "I'm Princess Katiebelle. Kindergartner. Rider of imaginary horses and reader of books!"
As the years went by I began collecting just about everything I could possibly get my hands on that had anything to do with Beauty and the Beast. The Christmas I turned six my mom sewed me my very own Belle dress, and I wore it every single day when I came home from school. I remember one time I was eating chocolate pudding in it, and spilled some on the left sleeve, leaving a permanent brown stain on the golden polyester. I treasured that dress because in my mind it truly defined who I was: a beautiful princess with long brown hair, and chocolaty brown eyes. I was Princess Katiebelle. Rider of imaginary horses named Philippe, and reader of books. I could conquer anything, and no beastly man was going to tell me what to do! I used to tell my parents, "When I grow up and go to dances I'm going to tell the boys, 'If you want to dance with a pretty girl, no beggars!'" Princesses never hang down their heads, and neither would I!
When it was time for my first high school prom there was no question in my mind of what my dress was going to look like. I had been devastated the year I turned 11 and could no longer wear my beautiful gold dress. So in the early spring of my junior year Mom took me out on a special date, just me and her, to buy fabric to make a new Belle dress. We scoured the rows and rows of fabric until we found the perfect combination, and then brought it to a seamstress to make my caparison dreams come true.
And then before I knew it I was in college, and looking for a way to make some extra cash without having to spend too much time doing it. I sat brainstorming, and then of course, there was the answer right in front of me. I would get paid to be myself. So I started entertaining little girls' birthday parties as Princess Belle. I can't tell you how amazing it is to walk into a room full of little girls and see their faces light up in delight because you are there. It still makes me tear up a little to think of their sweet hands reaching up to touch my face and to hear them exclaim, "I can't believe it's really you!" It often surprised me when at the end of the party the parents would hand me a check. I'd think, "Oh yeah! This is my job!"
I sit here reminiscing about all of this because today we had a big costume party at my work. Students and parents brought in their children to go trick-or-treating around the building. I wore my beautiful, sparkling Belle dress and greeted little princesses all over again. It was such a joy. As I watched them skipping up and down the halls in their shiny dresses, I could almost see a spunky, 5-year-old girl with two long brown, braided pig-tails, and chocolaty brown eyes. I imagined her rushing straight up at me with a look that said, "I'm Princess Katiebelle. Kindergartner. Rider of imaginary horses and reader of books!"
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Angels Round About You
It's been about a week and a half since I came down with the dreaded swine flu, and it was no picnic. I'm back at work and feeling much better, but I still get tired very easily. These past few days at work I've had to hit the ground running to make up for the days I missed, and it's been a struggle, but I've also noticed some wonderful blessings that have helped me get through the particularly rough patches. For me, it has been the fulfillment of the scripture in D&C 84:88 which reads, "And my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you to bear you up."
First, it's been a miracle that Brenton hasn't gotten sick. After a week's worth of being my helpful nurse, he hasn't had a fever or any symptoms of the highly contagious virus. He was so sweet and took care of meals, dishes, cleaning the apartment, and even took me to the movies last Friday to celebrate when my fever finally broke, meaning I was no longer contagious. Saturday marked the one-year anniversary of the day we got engaged, and we celebrated with a bottle of sparkling cider and the last two "Hoyos Oreos" we'd frozen from our wedding reception.
Next, I have been so blessed by my family, friends, and good members of the ward. Last Thursday a sister from my Relief Society walked over a large package to my apartment so I didn't have to go and get it myself from the office. It may have seemed like a simple thing to her, but it meant so much to me to not have to go and get it when I felt so miserable. The package was from my sister, Liz, containing business clothes for me to wear to work. It was a thoughtful gesture that came just when I needed it. Then on Monday, my first day back from being sick, I had a particularly hard day. I came home during my lunch break to eat a quick sandwich and saw a card from my mother informing me that she was sending me two magazine subscriptions. I felt tears spill over my cheeks just seeing my angel mother's handwriting that I love so much. I'm always amazed at how my family knows just when I need help, even when they're on the other side of the country.
Finally, I am so blessed to have a worthy husband who can give me priesthood blessings whenever I need them. After work on Monday I knew that the next few months at my job were going to be very stressful. I asked my husband for a blessing of comfort to know that I would make it through the difficult weeks ahead and feel confident in my abilities. That powerful blessing has made all the difference this week. The very next day I felt like my burdens were lighter. Truly, I felt that there was another person next to me helping me stay calm, focused, and confident. The only other time I've felt that way was on May 10th, 2005 when I was taking my AP Psychology exam. I didn't know why there were angels helping take that exam until afterwards, when I came home to find our house taped off and gutted out from a fire that morning. Both of these experiences though have taught me that angels really do watch over us. Often times I like to think that the ones helping me are my ancestors, who take a few minutes of their time to help their great, great, great, great granddaughter/niece. Either way, I know they are real, and it helps me feel connected to them when I do temple work.
The Lord does love us, and most of the time the way He sends help to us is through His servants. I'm grateful for the angels in my life, whether on this side of the veil or the other, they are a continuous strength to me.
First, it's been a miracle that Brenton hasn't gotten sick. After a week's worth of being my helpful nurse, he hasn't had a fever or any symptoms of the highly contagious virus. He was so sweet and took care of meals, dishes, cleaning the apartment, and even took me to the movies last Friday to celebrate when my fever finally broke, meaning I was no longer contagious. Saturday marked the one-year anniversary of the day we got engaged, and we celebrated with a bottle of sparkling cider and the last two "Hoyos Oreos" we'd frozen from our wedding reception.
Next, I have been so blessed by my family, friends, and good members of the ward. Last Thursday a sister from my Relief Society walked over a large package to my apartment so I didn't have to go and get it myself from the office. It may have seemed like a simple thing to her, but it meant so much to me to not have to go and get it when I felt so miserable. The package was from my sister, Liz, containing business clothes for me to wear to work. It was a thoughtful gesture that came just when I needed it. Then on Monday, my first day back from being sick, I had a particularly hard day. I came home during my lunch break to eat a quick sandwich and saw a card from my mother informing me that she was sending me two magazine subscriptions. I felt tears spill over my cheeks just seeing my angel mother's handwriting that I love so much. I'm always amazed at how my family knows just when I need help, even when they're on the other side of the country.
Finally, I am so blessed to have a worthy husband who can give me priesthood blessings whenever I need them. After work on Monday I knew that the next few months at my job were going to be very stressful. I asked my husband for a blessing of comfort to know that I would make it through the difficult weeks ahead and feel confident in my abilities. That powerful blessing has made all the difference this week. The very next day I felt like my burdens were lighter. Truly, I felt that there was another person next to me helping me stay calm, focused, and confident. The only other time I've felt that way was on May 10th, 2005 when I was taking my AP Psychology exam. I didn't know why there were angels helping take that exam until afterwards, when I came home to find our house taped off and gutted out from a fire that morning. Both of these experiences though have taught me that angels really do watch over us. Often times I like to think that the ones helping me are my ancestors, who take a few minutes of their time to help their great, great, great, great granddaughter/niece. Either way, I know they are real, and it helps me feel connected to them when I do temple work.
The Lord does love us, and most of the time the way He sends help to us is through His servants. I'm grateful for the angels in my life, whether on this side of the veil or the other, they are a continuous strength to me.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Even Hidden Treasures
I've told myself that I don't want another month to go by without putting down a new blog post. So while my husband is at Priesthood session I thought I'd take some time to tell you about the latest things I've learned in my exciting life.
For one thing, I am so grateful to have a job. The nation's current events have made this task somewhat of a challenge for anyone in the unemployed market. When my husband and I sat down and recognized the very real necessity that I find employment, I felt for perhaps the first time in my life the stress and anxiety of being poor. If my family was poor growing up, I never knew about it, because my parents were so wonderful at budgeting and keeping us happy. Now as newlyweds, Brenton and I are on our own in that department, and like so many newlyweds before us, are realizing how very expensive it is to live. We knew the day would come when we would discover that, but as I've said before, there is no substitute for experience.
With that being said, I knew that the Lord would bless us because we were paying our tithing and fast offerings, and doing everything we could to remain worthy of His help. Each week while we went to the temple, I would leave that sacred building knowing that all would be well. Then while Brenton was in class, I would research jobs, send in applications, and practice interview questions in the mirror.
At last the return phone call arrived for me to be interviewed by a potential employer. Although it went well, once I had left the building all the fears and anxieties returned for the next week as I waited to hear back and still continued to search for other jobs. While I felt comfort from the Holy Ghost, I was still nervous and apprehensive. But the Lord did hear my prayers, and I was offered the position. Not only that but it's a position that addresses all the needs Brenton and I were praying so earnestly for. It is also a job that I can truly take pride in. I believe in what I'm doing there, and what the company stands for.
I was expecting this great answer to my prayers to fill the needs that I hoped it would. However, I have been continually surprised at how it is answering my other prayers, too. It often makes me think of the scripture in D&C 89:19 "And [he] shall find wisdom and great treasures of knowledge, even hidden treasures." Upon arriving back in Utah I felt out of place, almost like I had taken a step backwards for getting a degree, because my whole world was still back at school. This new job has given me a place where I feel comfortable, and proud of my accomplishments. I'm learning a great deal about self reliance, and several tasks in my training are helping me to solve other problems in my life outside the job. I have a reason to get up each morning, eat a decent breakfast, and I have somewhere to be each day. It has given me confidence because I feel needed. My husband is grateful for the efforts I'm making for our family, and we are more affectionate and kind to each other at home. I am discovering that my efforts in school and the dozens of humanities classes I took are a real asset to my job, and I'm grateful I chose that major. I am eating better, sleeping better, and finding great self-fulfillment, putting the stress off my husband to try and fill that need. All of these things are blessings that I was not expecting to receive from work. They are the fulfillment of that scripture for my life. They are my hidden treasures.
Most often, the greatest blessings in life require us to take a step in the dark before the Lord turns on the light. That is what faith is. It is obedience and work combined with a trust that the Lord's plan is far better than our own. It does require "all that we can do," in my case researching jobs, applying, practicing, etc. but then the final step is one of faith and trust. And when the Lord turns on the light revealing the next step in the path it is one of glorious surprise: our hidden treasures! He has so much more in store for us than we could ever have produced on our own, and I try to remember that when things still get stressful in my life; particularly at work when I'm trying my hardest to grasp every new concept in training.
I know that my Heavenly Father listens to my prayers. I know that He answers every single one in a time frame that works with His will, and not mine. I know that His will is infinitely better for me and for my family. I know He hears and loves me, and I know that there is no other way to find greater happiness than by following His path, for that is when the hidden treasures are found.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Mormon Messages
Recently, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has created a channel on Youtube entitled, "Mormon Messages." It is a collection of stories and short videos focusing on the lives of different members of the church and their experiences. The stories range from the importance of a good father, to recovery stories from 9/11 survivors, to testimonies of Jesus Christ. I hadn't really taken the time to view any of them when they first came out, but last night Brenton and I spent about two hours watching all of them and being emotionally moved with every story.
These short clips answer questions that many of us ponder during our lives. How do I overcome adversity? Why does life often take an unexpected turn? Are Mormons Christian? Is my Heavenly Father aware of me? Why do Mormons build temples? Each of the clips focus on a different member of the church, and how they have received answers to these questions. Each one is beautifully simple, yet very powerful. I was touched by all the testimonies of the strong and faithful people in this world, and how the love of the Savior reaches out to all of us.
I encourage all of you to take some time out from your day and view some of these messages. They are all touching and worth the few minutes it takes from your day. If you still have questions, feel free to visit www.mormon.org, where you can ask any question you would like through the phone or internet, and you can chat with a live administrator, or search frequently asked questions with video clip responses. You might be surprised by what you learn.
I know this church is true. I know that it has brought more happiness into my life than anything else possibly could. I know that this life is focused around families. I know that families can last forever through the blessings of the temple. I know that Jesus Christ is real, alive, and is aware of me. I know that each one of us can discover these truths for ourselves, and that Heavenly Father loves each of us enough to take the time to give a personal witness to all that He lives, and so does his Son.
These brief messages can fill your day with a bit more sunshine than you had before. You can access them by going to http://www.youtube.com/user/mormonmessages
Thursday, July 23, 2009
I Just Felt Like It
So, awhile back everyone's list of 25 things about themselves was the "in" thing on Facebook, and I wrote mine, but only sent it to people as a private message. I figured it would be pretty harmless to post on here, because you don't have to read if it you don't want to. So here goes.
1. Even when I've pretended not to believe it, or when I was at my lowest points in self-esteem, I have always believed that I am pretty.
2. I have been afraid of the dark my whole life until just a few months ago, when I decided once and for all that I cannot keep reliving horrific memories of my past every time the lights go off. Since then I don't even flinch when a bulb burns out. I'm really proud of myself.
3. I still play pretend games almost every day. Whether I'm an undercover spy or America's princess, you can bet that when you see me I'm imagining my life in some fantastic, dramatic plot. Sometimes it's the only way I can get through the mundane tasks of the day.
4. I collect paper dolls. I have over 100 sets. Not only do I collect them, but I cut them out and play with them. In fact, some day I want to spread them ALL out and play with them, or at least take a picture. Most likely this will need to take place in a stake center cultural hall in order to have enough room.
5. Even though my siblings would beg to differ, I always felt singled out in my family as I grew up. When I was little, I was so unlike my two older sisters that my parents would buy them matching outfits and I would get something completely different. My two little brothers always played together, so much of my childhood was spent playing alone. Maybe that's why I have always loved the spotlight and attention.
6. I don't think missionary work is hard. I am amazed at how many excuses good church members can come up with to avoid preaching the gospel when it is so easy. Makes me slightly irritated.
7. While I like going to sports events and have a good time, if someone were to say, "Katie, I don't really want to go to the game tonight," I wouldn't shed a tear.
8. I love to read. I hate borrowing books or getting them from the library. If I'm going to read it, it's mine, and I have to read it with a pencil in hand so I can make notes and underline passages that I like.
9. I have a complete arsenal of clothing, and somehow I can still wake up in the morning feeling like I have nothing to wear. I still don't know why. It's helping my dear husband gain more patience.
10. In high school some people called me a poser because I liked dressing up in different fashion cliques to get a glimpse at other people's lives. It was fascinating to me. Weird, I know.
11. I am one heck of a salesman. I could sell you a toothpick and not only sell it, but have you wondering how you ever lived without it.
12. I have a hard time controlling my emotions. When I'm sad, the whole world knows it. When I'm irritated, happy, bored, testy, elated, you can bet the whole world knows it. That's right. The WHOLE WORLD.
13. I'm pretty sure I could eat my body weight in marzipan and avocados. Not together!!!!! But seriously, they're both amazing.
14. I'm pretty much the girliest girl I've ever met. I also realized a long time ago that there are things about me that will always remain childlike, and I don't see that as a weakness by any means.
15. I can remember every time a person has ever yelled at me, and every single time I have cried. No matter who they were, no matter where I was, no matter if they were a jerk or someone I dearly loved. It has taught me that I will never yell at my children. I'll set up an intercom system in the house if I have to.
16. I think my hair is beautiful, but I hate the hairline I inherited from my mom's side. It dips way back on the sides so every time I pull my hair back it looks like I'm balding slightly. I call them the holes in my head.
17. Secretly, I have always loved being short. Who wouldn't want to always be front and center? Besides, I can wear whatever shoes I want and it's never a problem.
18. I know the Atonement of Jesus Christ is real. I know that people can change. I believe in that. I have seen it happen in my own life and the lives of many others. Because of this I try my best to always see the good in people.
19. I think meatloaf should be illegal. Blech....
20. If I was a millionaire, I would always have fresh flowers in my home, and every Friday I would dress up, go out to dinner and never order water as my drink, and then either go out dancing or see a show.
21. I am very talented at any musical instrument I pick up, but can never seem to get above 90% in virtuosity. And yet it always bothers me when I only place 2nd or 3rd.
22. I don't like cooking, but I think that's only because I'm still inexperienced. I do however enjoy baking. It always fascinates me to put several funny looking ingredients into a big pan, put it in the oven and pull out something extraordinary.
23. I know that McDonald's is falling out of favor with the world, but I don't think there will ever be a day when I say, "No thanks. I don't really want a BigMac."
24. I think good surprises are the greatest things in the whole world.
25. Marrying Brenton was the best decision I've ever made, and I'm still daily discovering new reasons why he is so perfect for me. I'm amazed that he can still help me grow each day, and that I'm continually becoming the best possible version of myself from being around him.
And that's that!
1. Even when I've pretended not to believe it, or when I was at my lowest points in self-esteem, I have always believed that I am pretty.
2. I have been afraid of the dark my whole life until just a few months ago, when I decided once and for all that I cannot keep reliving horrific memories of my past every time the lights go off. Since then I don't even flinch when a bulb burns out. I'm really proud of myself.
3. I still play pretend games almost every day. Whether I'm an undercover spy or America's princess, you can bet that when you see me I'm imagining my life in some fantastic, dramatic plot. Sometimes it's the only way I can get through the mundane tasks of the day.
4. I collect paper dolls. I have over 100 sets. Not only do I collect them, but I cut them out and play with them. In fact, some day I want to spread them ALL out and play with them, or at least take a picture. Most likely this will need to take place in a stake center cultural hall in order to have enough room.
5. Even though my siblings would beg to differ, I always felt singled out in my family as I grew up. When I was little, I was so unlike my two older sisters that my parents would buy them matching outfits and I would get something completely different. My two little brothers always played together, so much of my childhood was spent playing alone. Maybe that's why I have always loved the spotlight and attention.
6. I don't think missionary work is hard. I am amazed at how many excuses good church members can come up with to avoid preaching the gospel when it is so easy. Makes me slightly irritated.
7. While I like going to sports events and have a good time, if someone were to say, "Katie, I don't really want to go to the game tonight," I wouldn't shed a tear.
8. I love to read. I hate borrowing books or getting them from the library. If I'm going to read it, it's mine, and I have to read it with a pencil in hand so I can make notes and underline passages that I like.
9. I have a complete arsenal of clothing, and somehow I can still wake up in the morning feeling like I have nothing to wear. I still don't know why. It's helping my dear husband gain more patience.
10. In high school some people called me a poser because I liked dressing up in different fashion cliques to get a glimpse at other people's lives. It was fascinating to me. Weird, I know.
11. I am one heck of a salesman. I could sell you a toothpick and not only sell it, but have you wondering how you ever lived without it.
12. I have a hard time controlling my emotions. When I'm sad, the whole world knows it. When I'm irritated, happy, bored, testy, elated, you can bet the whole world knows it. That's right. The WHOLE WORLD.
13. I'm pretty sure I could eat my body weight in marzipan and avocados. Not together!!!!! But seriously, they're both amazing.
14. I'm pretty much the girliest girl I've ever met. I also realized a long time ago that there are things about me that will always remain childlike, and I don't see that as a weakness by any means.
15. I can remember every time a person has ever yelled at me, and every single time I have cried. No matter who they were, no matter where I was, no matter if they were a jerk or someone I dearly loved. It has taught me that I will never yell at my children. I'll set up an intercom system in the house if I have to.
16. I think my hair is beautiful, but I hate the hairline I inherited from my mom's side. It dips way back on the sides so every time I pull my hair back it looks like I'm balding slightly. I call them the holes in my head.
17. Secretly, I have always loved being short. Who wouldn't want to always be front and center? Besides, I can wear whatever shoes I want and it's never a problem.
18. I know the Atonement of Jesus Christ is real. I know that people can change. I believe in that. I have seen it happen in my own life and the lives of many others. Because of this I try my best to always see the good in people.
19. I think meatloaf should be illegal. Blech....
20. If I was a millionaire, I would always have fresh flowers in my home, and every Friday I would dress up, go out to dinner and never order water as my drink, and then either go out dancing or see a show.
21. I am very talented at any musical instrument I pick up, but can never seem to get above 90% in virtuosity. And yet it always bothers me when I only place 2nd or 3rd.
22. I don't like cooking, but I think that's only because I'm still inexperienced. I do however enjoy baking. It always fascinates me to put several funny looking ingredients into a big pan, put it in the oven and pull out something extraordinary.
23. I know that McDonald's is falling out of favor with the world, but I don't think there will ever be a day when I say, "No thanks. I don't really want a BigMac."
24. I think good surprises are the greatest things in the whole world.
25. Marrying Brenton was the best decision I've ever made, and I'm still daily discovering new reasons why he is so perfect for me. I'm amazed that he can still help me grow each day, and that I'm continually becoming the best possible version of myself from being around him.
And that's that!
Thursday, June 25, 2009
The Beginning of 'Happily Ever After'
Can it really be three months since my last post? I often put in my journal when it's been a long time since I've written that it's hard to put my life on hold in order to write about it. However, the last time I posted an entry I was still engaged, and now I'm a married woman! It's still so exciting for me to write down "Katie Hoyos" on something.
I felt so prepared for marriage. and I'm very grateful for everything I did to plan and be ready for such a big step, but as my parents have often told me, there's no amount of preparation that can compensate for experience. Next week we will have been married for two months. Two months! It's funny, because I feel like I've been married my whole life. It's such a big life change in every possible way, that I almost can't remember what it was like to not be married.
I have found in just these very few months that marriage, just as all things in life, is what you make of it. Only this time it takes three people. Brenton and I are so wonderfully happy because we work our tails off every single day for each other and for the Lord. We're happy because we want to be. I'm amazed each day that if I'm selfish it effects him, too. Suddenly I start to think about everything in marriage that's difficult, and all the new responsibilities we now both have and I think, "what was I getting myself into?" But then I have to take a step back and know that this was the most important decision in my life, but that I made it. I chose to marry him, and when I did I knew the sacrifice it would take. Then with a bit of an attitude adjustment, I remember that we're in this together and I forget myself. Suddenly everything is better. I'm happy, and I can't imagine life without my sweetheart with me.
It's a fun place to be at the beginning of the phrase, "Happily Ever After," and I'm even now recognizing that it remains 'ever after' just so long as both of us recognize that our choices have a great impact on each other. I can't quite express how wonderful it is to pray together, to have family scripture study and Family Home Evening together. Being able to recognize that we are a family and we make decisions together is such a great blessing. And by putting the commandments first, knowing that our first priority is to the Lord gives us the assurance that we will make it. Not just now, but "ever after."
I felt so prepared for marriage. and I'm very grateful for everything I did to plan and be ready for such a big step, but as my parents have often told me, there's no amount of preparation that can compensate for experience. Next week we will have been married for two months. Two months! It's funny, because I feel like I've been married my whole life. It's such a big life change in every possible way, that I almost can't remember what it was like to not be married.
I have found in just these very few months that marriage, just as all things in life, is what you make of it. Only this time it takes three people. Brenton and I are so wonderfully happy because we work our tails off every single day for each other and for the Lord. We're happy because we want to be. I'm amazed each day that if I'm selfish it effects him, too. Suddenly I start to think about everything in marriage that's difficult, and all the new responsibilities we now both have and I think, "what was I getting myself into?" But then I have to take a step back and know that this was the most important decision in my life, but that I made it. I chose to marry him, and when I did I knew the sacrifice it would take. Then with a bit of an attitude adjustment, I remember that we're in this together and I forget myself. Suddenly everything is better. I'm happy, and I can't imagine life without my sweetheart with me.
It's a fun place to be at the beginning of the phrase, "Happily Ever After," and I'm even now recognizing that it remains 'ever after' just so long as both of us recognize that our choices have a great impact on each other. I can't quite express how wonderful it is to pray together, to have family scripture study and Family Home Evening together. Being able to recognize that we are a family and we make decisions together is such a great blessing. And by putting the commandments first, knowing that our first priority is to the Lord gives us the assurance that we will make it. Not just now, but "ever after."
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Why I'm Getting Married in the Temple
As I have been conversing with several of my friends about my upcoming marriage, often the topic of conversation turns to where the wedding will be taking place, and why I'm choosing to be married there. As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I have always made the conscious decision to get married in the temple. It is not just because it is the tradition of LDS culture, or because it is expected of me by my family. I am choosing to be married in a Latter-day saint temple because it will allow me to be sealed to Brenton not just until "death do us part," but for "time and all eternity."
There is no ordinance in the church more sacred than that of eternal marriage. By marrying Brenton in the Lord's Holy house, we have the opportunity to be together forever. Yes, forever.I can't think of a more beautiful promise. It is one that is binding on earth and in heaven. In addition, every child that we have the privilege of having on this earth will also be sealed to us. As soon as he or she takes their first breath, they are ours forever. There is no other ordinance that can do this other than the sealing ordinance performed in the sacred and holy temple. That is why on our wedding announcements we have the quote from "The Family: A Proclamation to the World" which states, "The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan." There is no other way but through the temple that this can happen. It is not merely a beautiful building, but an essential ordinance.
To me, heaven would not be heaven without my family and my sweetheart. I cannot fathom a life of eternal joy and happiness if they weren't there. I know that the only way for them to be there with me is through the temple of our Heavenly Father. Because my own mother and father chose to be sealed in the temple, I know that I will always be with them so long as I keep the Lord's commandments and endure to the end. Now Brenton and I are making that same choice so that our children will have the same blessings. It is all part of our loving Heavenly Father's plan for us. This is why as a member of the church I believe so strongly in the family. The times that I am with Brenton and my family are the closest to heaven that I have ever felt.
I know that temples are the Lord's house on this earth. I know that families can be together forever, but it requires more than just a wedding certificate. It requires the sealing ordinance that can only be performed in the holy temple. It is through the Atonement of our Savior, Jesus Christ. I know that He lives. I know that He suffered for each one of us because He loves us. I know that the only way to return to Him is through His gospel. While His truth is made manifest throughout the world, the fullness of its glorious message is found in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I know this to be true. I am so grateful for this knowledge and the blessing it has been in my life. I love my Savior, and I love His plan. It truly is the plan of happiness, and it is through that plan that I really can live happily ever after through the eternities with my husband and family.
There is no ordinance in the church more sacred than that of eternal marriage. By marrying Brenton in the Lord's Holy house, we have the opportunity to be together forever. Yes, forever.I can't think of a more beautiful promise. It is one that is binding on earth and in heaven. In addition, every child that we have the privilege of having on this earth will also be sealed to us. As soon as he or she takes their first breath, they are ours forever. There is no other ordinance that can do this other than the sealing ordinance performed in the sacred and holy temple. That is why on our wedding announcements we have the quote from "The Family: A Proclamation to the World" which states, "The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan." There is no other way but through the temple that this can happen. It is not merely a beautiful building, but an essential ordinance.
To me, heaven would not be heaven without my family and my sweetheart. I cannot fathom a life of eternal joy and happiness if they weren't there. I know that the only way for them to be there with me is through the temple of our Heavenly Father. Because my own mother and father chose to be sealed in the temple, I know that I will always be with them so long as I keep the Lord's commandments and endure to the end. Now Brenton and I are making that same choice so that our children will have the same blessings. It is all part of our loving Heavenly Father's plan for us. This is why as a member of the church I believe so strongly in the family. The times that I am with Brenton and my family are the closest to heaven that I have ever felt.
I know that temples are the Lord's house on this earth. I know that families can be together forever, but it requires more than just a wedding certificate. It requires the sealing ordinance that can only be performed in the holy temple. It is through the Atonement of our Savior, Jesus Christ. I know that He lives. I know that He suffered for each one of us because He loves us. I know that the only way to return to Him is through His gospel. While His truth is made manifest throughout the world, the fullness of its glorious message is found in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I know this to be true. I am so grateful for this knowledge and the blessing it has been in my life. I love my Savior, and I love His plan. It truly is the plan of happiness, and it is through that plan that I really can live happily ever after through the eternities with my husband and family.
Monday, February 16, 2009
He Gave me Wings
It's 74 days until I get married, and to me it can't come soon enough. I didn't know I could ever be this happy. I used to dream about it in high school, but as I started college those dreams vanished and by the time I was half-way through I felt I would never have the life I imagined as a little girl.
In a previous post I wrote about an experience that gave me my testimony of Jesus Christ's infinite atonement. After that experience, I once again believed that I could have "every good thing." That doesn't mean I wouldn't be given trials along the way, but I believed my happiness would only increase as I strove to follow Christ's teachings and live worthily to receive His promised blessings. As I began to realign my life with the gospel, I remembered a quote from Sister Hinckley that she said about her husband, President Gordon B. Hinckley. She stated, "He gave me wings." I wondered if that would even be possible. I had never dated a boy that made me feel like that. I often felt my opinions were never validated, and that if I wanted to go out on a limb or try something new, it was either completely out of the question or I had to ask for permission. I began pouring over my patriarchal blessing to find information about the man I would marry if I stayed true to my covenants. I prayed that if I held true to the promises I had made with the Lord, He would give me those blessings in His own time.
November 5th, 2007 I met a boy in the library. Much like the kind and good elders of Israel I had been dating all semester, he was courteous and sweet as we struck up a friendship. We dated casually for a few weeks, and I began to see qualities in him that I had only dreamed about. Suddenly, my opinions mattered, and as I spoke about dreams and desires that I wanted, he gladly encouraged me to shoot for them. I often wondered those first few months, "Is this real? You mean, this kind of boy exists? And he's interested in me?"
As time passed we began to date steadily and I started to realize that everything in my life was better. I felt so free, like I could do anything and he would be supportive. My family was supportive, my friends were supportive. I didn't know that I could be on the same page with everyone. I had never felt so beautiful. He was so attentive to me. Everything I said mattered. Every emotion I felt was understood. For the first time, I could be myself, and since I'd never dated someone before who let me be that way, I finally learned who "myself" really was. I wanted to be my best self around him not because he expected it of me, but because I expected it of myself just from being around him. He helped me achieve goals I never thought I would reach. I watched both of us slowly become the people that we always saw in each other. It was even a physical change. I literally saw my countenance become brighter. The contrast in photos was startling. I was beginning to learn what love truly is: complete selflessness. In a word, charity.
And now I am going to be a wife! I am going to be sealed for time and all eternity. I will be able to spend the rest of forever with the person that I love most. And because we both have lived up to the qualifications of worthiness, the covenants that we will make will bind us not only to each other, but to our sweet children that we will someday have. What a magnificent promise.
I sit here and type this looking at my glittering left hand that shines with so much symbolism. As I gaze at the heart-shaped diamond with three others on each side, I see a heart that has taken flight. I now know what sweet Sister Hinckley meant when she said, "He gave me wings!"
In a previous post I wrote about an experience that gave me my testimony of Jesus Christ's infinite atonement. After that experience, I once again believed that I could have "every good thing." That doesn't mean I wouldn't be given trials along the way, but I believed my happiness would only increase as I strove to follow Christ's teachings and live worthily to receive His promised blessings. As I began to realign my life with the gospel, I remembered a quote from Sister Hinckley that she said about her husband, President Gordon B. Hinckley. She stated, "He gave me wings." I wondered if that would even be possible. I had never dated a boy that made me feel like that. I often felt my opinions were never validated, and that if I wanted to go out on a limb or try something new, it was either completely out of the question or I had to ask for permission. I began pouring over my patriarchal blessing to find information about the man I would marry if I stayed true to my covenants. I prayed that if I held true to the promises I had made with the Lord, He would give me those blessings in His own time.
November 5th, 2007 I met a boy in the library. Much like the kind and good elders of Israel I had been dating all semester, he was courteous and sweet as we struck up a friendship. We dated casually for a few weeks, and I began to see qualities in him that I had only dreamed about. Suddenly, my opinions mattered, and as I spoke about dreams and desires that I wanted, he gladly encouraged me to shoot for them. I often wondered those first few months, "Is this real? You mean, this kind of boy exists? And he's interested in me?"
As time passed we began to date steadily and I started to realize that everything in my life was better. I felt so free, like I could do anything and he would be supportive. My family was supportive, my friends were supportive. I didn't know that I could be on the same page with everyone. I had never felt so beautiful. He was so attentive to me. Everything I said mattered. Every emotion I felt was understood. For the first time, I could be myself, and since I'd never dated someone before who let me be that way, I finally learned who "myself" really was. I wanted to be my best self around him not because he expected it of me, but because I expected it of myself just from being around him. He helped me achieve goals I never thought I would reach. I watched both of us slowly become the people that we always saw in each other. It was even a physical change. I literally saw my countenance become brighter. The contrast in photos was startling. I was beginning to learn what love truly is: complete selflessness. In a word, charity.
And now I am going to be a wife! I am going to be sealed for time and all eternity. I will be able to spend the rest of forever with the person that I love most. And because we both have lived up to the qualifications of worthiness, the covenants that we will make will bind us not only to each other, but to our sweet children that we will someday have. What a magnificent promise.
I sit here and type this looking at my glittering left hand that shines with so much symbolism. As I gaze at the heart-shaped diamond with three others on each side, I see a heart that has taken flight. I now know what sweet Sister Hinckley meant when she said, "He gave me wings!"
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
I Have Confidence in Me!
One of my favorite musicals of all time is "The Sound of Music." I've seen that movie countless times. In fact, as a little girl I didn't even know it was called "The Sound of Music." I grew up calling it, "Mom's favorite movie." One of the songs from the musical is entitled, "I Have Confidence." Upon first watching it's usually one of the pieces that is easily forgotten sized up against, "My Favorite Things," Sixteen Going on Seventeen," and "Climb Every Mountain." However, recently I've come to love that song and everything it stands for. Most importantly, I've learned that I too, have confidence.
I have confidence in my education. I have studied, laboured, stretched and sweat towards earning a degree that I can be proud of. Most importantly, I believe, I have learned how to learn. Because of the home I grew up in, I have always had a passion for reading, and that has fed my continuous desire to learn, even if that desire will never extend towards picking up another math or science book again. Ever.
I have confidence in my ability to appear and act professional. I've been noticing a gradual change towards appearing more mature and ready to enter an adult world. I've been slowly ditching the dozens of t-shirts in my drawers, wearing more shirts with collars or sweaters. For the past year now I've established my own business complete with a license, my own contract, references, and portfolio of contented clients. I'm learning to stand tall and speak up, even if it is to someone three times my age.
I have confidence in my charismatic personality. One of the best gifts I have been given is the ability to be pleasantly amiable. I used to think that it was just because I'm pretty, and I used it mostly to my advantage in the dating game, often going on several dates a week. Yesterday however, in a personal revelation, I realized that I have been given this gift of charity and an immense passion for life to bless others. I've always known I have a bubbly personality, but I've finally made the connection that it is a gift. I can lift others all around me in a very short amount of time. What a blessing. I am understanding more now what it means to "mourn with those that mourn, [and] comfort those that stand in need of comfort." -Mosiah 18: 9
Finally, I have confidence in my knowledge the Savior, and of his divine Atonement. I have always understood and known that Jesus Christ suffered for my sins and transgressions. I know that by coming to Him and dropping my burden at his feet I can be clean. But my true and most fervent understanding of the Atonement occurred about a year and a half ago, in July of 2007. I had reached a point in my life where I had to choose what was more important to me: The despair I felt from my consistently bad choices, or the embarrassment of confessing them and following the Lord no matter what the painful consequences might be. I remember thinking, "Nothing could be worse than the way I feel right now. I want to be healed. I've had enough." And then two very distinct phrases came into my mind. One was by Neil L. Anderson stating, "It's true isn't it? Then what else matters?" The other was from the hymn, "I Believe in Christ" stating, "I believe in Christ, so come what may." I knew that I had made my choice. I took everything I believed in and stepped into the dark, not knowing what I would have to face for my previous decisions. The transformation was miraculous. I knew the Savior suffered for my sins, but now I also knew and understood that Christ suffered for my pains too. He literally took it all away, and I felt the immense burden of my condemnation released. I am clean. Every wit. I know that all of us as children of our Heavenly Father have the ability to feel that change. I know because I have felt it believing like Alma that I was "the very vilest of sinners." Yet through Christ, I am "harrowed up by the memory of my sins no more." What has taken the place of all of that guilt and sorrow is love. And because I am filled with love, "as you can see I have Confidence in me!"
I have confidence in my education. I have studied, laboured, stretched and sweat towards earning a degree that I can be proud of. Most importantly, I believe, I have learned how to learn. Because of the home I grew up in, I have always had a passion for reading, and that has fed my continuous desire to learn, even if that desire will never extend towards picking up another math or science book again. Ever.
I have confidence in my ability to appear and act professional. I've been noticing a gradual change towards appearing more mature and ready to enter an adult world. I've been slowly ditching the dozens of t-shirts in my drawers, wearing more shirts with collars or sweaters. For the past year now I've established my own business complete with a license, my own contract, references, and portfolio of contented clients. I'm learning to stand tall and speak up, even if it is to someone three times my age.
I have confidence in my charismatic personality. One of the best gifts I have been given is the ability to be pleasantly amiable. I used to think that it was just because I'm pretty, and I used it mostly to my advantage in the dating game, often going on several dates a week. Yesterday however, in a personal revelation, I realized that I have been given this gift of charity and an immense passion for life to bless others. I've always known I have a bubbly personality, but I've finally made the connection that it is a gift. I can lift others all around me in a very short amount of time. What a blessing. I am understanding more now what it means to "mourn with those that mourn, [and] comfort those that stand in need of comfort." -Mosiah 18: 9
Finally, I have confidence in my knowledge the Savior, and of his divine Atonement. I have always understood and known that Jesus Christ suffered for my sins and transgressions. I know that by coming to Him and dropping my burden at his feet I can be clean. But my true and most fervent understanding of the Atonement occurred about a year and a half ago, in July of 2007. I had reached a point in my life where I had to choose what was more important to me: The despair I felt from my consistently bad choices, or the embarrassment of confessing them and following the Lord no matter what the painful consequences might be. I remember thinking, "Nothing could be worse than the way I feel right now. I want to be healed. I've had enough." And then two very distinct phrases came into my mind. One was by Neil L. Anderson stating, "It's true isn't it? Then what else matters?" The other was from the hymn, "I Believe in Christ" stating, "I believe in Christ, so come what may." I knew that I had made my choice. I took everything I believed in and stepped into the dark, not knowing what I would have to face for my previous decisions. The transformation was miraculous. I knew the Savior suffered for my sins, but now I also knew and understood that Christ suffered for my pains too. He literally took it all away, and I felt the immense burden of my condemnation released. I am clean. Every wit. I know that all of us as children of our Heavenly Father have the ability to feel that change. I know because I have felt it believing like Alma that I was "the very vilest of sinners." Yet through Christ, I am "harrowed up by the memory of my sins no more." What has taken the place of all of that guilt and sorrow is love. And because I am filled with love, "as you can see I have Confidence in me!"
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