Daddy's Smile, Mommy's Eyes

There is plenty I need to catch up on, but today I'm more focused on this guy:

In a few months, Ryan's whole world is going to change. It seems he senses this, and has been vying for our attention nearly every second through both good and not-so-good behavior. In a way, it's been helpful to have him pull a personality 180 now, so we have some time to plan and figure out how to help him through this major transition. We're all adjusting and trying new ways to help him feel loved, yet not express his cravings for attention through negative behavior. We have good days and hard days, and almost everything we try takes us two steps forward one week, one step back the next, but it's getting better. While it's definitely requiring more time and effort on my part, Ryan is making me a better mom, and helping me realize not all techniques work for every child.

A few weeks ago I was chatting with my sister about the many reasons I'm so in love with Ryan. There are the obvious things, like how smart, happy, and outgoing he is, but one of my absolute favorite things about Ryan is his smile. Ryan is our first born. He's the first person ever to have both mine and Brenton's genes. He's the beautiful result of our marriage and decision to raise a family. From the first time I witnessed him smile, I knew there was something extra special about him.

You see, Ryan has his daddy's mouth. In fact, from the nose down he is all Daddy. This means every time I see my sweet little boy smile, I see Brenton. When Ryan's happy face beams at me I think, "that's the same smile I fell in love with!" and fall in love with it all over again. I look for hundreds of reasons a day to see Ryan smile and remember the way it felt to fall in love with a green-eyed boy from Kansas. But, Ryan's eyes are brown; a deep, rich, chocolatey brown that's so dark from far away you can't distinguish the iris from the pupil. In short, Ryan has my eyes. It's one of the few physical features he got from me, and I love it. Especially when he smiles, because not only do I get to see the smile I fell in love with, but also the way my eyes look every time Brenton smiles at me. I get the entire package of my husband's smile and my reaction with one look from my son. It's amazing, and I can't get enough of it!

I'm not sure what Jackson's facial features will look like, but I know he'll be the perfect blend of me and Brenton. And who knows? Maybe he'll have my mouth and Brenton's eyes, so Brenton can experience the same thing I do every time Ryan smiles at me!